i would really like a day when i don't think of him. today is not that day. since i woke up this morning ive thought about the lies he's told me and i continue to take offense to them. God please i pray that i will no longer take offense to them. what's done is done and praise you for finally letting me see the real him!! i should be happy im out of the whole mess but im not happy about being deceived. i want to forgive him for going behind my back and speaking evil words saturated with honey and peanut butter. he used my favorite ingredients to make me swallow his lies and believe he could be the person i wanted him to be. i don't know how to deal with all of these emotions because i feel like there is this hole in my stomach that refuses to close. it closes for a second when i smoke a cigarette but then when the nicotine is burnt out the hole is empty again.

im such a stupid girl. i continued to push for the truth and now i have all my answers. well alot of answers and my mind is just filling in the rest. the whole thing is haunting me!!!! ugh!!! i just want to beat the hell out of him!!! why would you do that!! that smug asshole text me and said i took her to the beach and my sister's wedding, we had an amazing time. wow!! i freaking hate you!!!!! before he left he cried until he had a bloody nose and when he came home he was right where we left off. "just be with my katie, i want to be your only one." fuck you!!! fuck you!!! ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what am i suppose to do with all the rage... ugh... just let it go.. just let it go. his sin will find him out. i hate being right about everything when it comes to this. i knew better everytime!!!! he took advantage

I HATE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! UGH!!

oh i am furious right now!!
don't F with me you son of a ugh!!. i should have been alot meaner earlier on. i should have destoried your life when i had the chance and when it would not have made me look this stupid!!
she's not even pretty!! ahh..i really thought the girl had a chance but when i finally looked at all of her pictures...she's a dog! it's like the mullet fat asian again!! accept this chick isn't fat, she actually has a pretty nice body. her face tho!! like reallly?? he said it himself, "id take a nasty faced girl with a sexy body over a gorgeous faced girl and a nasty body." who the fuck says that! like really who!? a moron that's who!! and he had the nerve to call me "half retarded" yea because i fn dated you for so long that's the only reason you thought that about me!! she's all about politics and the news..that's awesome..that's how adam is and i like that about him but D man (pussy of a man) didn't even vote!! didn't vote!!!!! and he is dating a girl who was student body president. i asked him what he thought about the canidates and he said, "they're equally good." well how so? "i dunno..they just are." wow fn really?? hmm i wonder what your political short haired burnette girlfriend thinks about your stupid ass mind. i hate you so much you bastard!!!! no wonder why you were so nice to me whenever i found anything out, you were afriad i would tell her. then you finally pissed me off enough and i did tell her you disgusting cheater!! you even cheat on math tests and pyschology tests. i can remember one time telling you i was afriad to take my math test and you said, "just look at someone else's paper." "is that what you do." "yeah, when i don't know the answer." don't call me "half retarded" when i pass all my classes on my own and you pass them (oh wait you fail a class every semester) by cheating. what a great fn nurse you're going to be.. oh wait you can't get into nursing school.